Monday, 16 July 2007 – My time with my client went to a new level. I can’t say that he has received more healing, but he has obtained a greater understanding of himself and his struggle. For me, this is a break through. He can take the knowledge he has and apply it to his issues. The problem can be that it is easy to make rational decisions and discoveries without every moving forward in recovery. This is because recovery happens at the heart level and knowledge is all head. Change of character takes place deep inside our soul or heart. Without God’s assistance an individual can not make the leap from head to heart. I pray that the person I’m working with will allow God to work in his life to take the longest journey in a human’s life with his new discovery to the level of eternal change of the heart.

Tuesday, 17 July 2007 – Our time at the male rehab center was hard this time around, because it seemed that everyone was tired. They were given extra assignments from their program that caused them to be non-responsive with more sitting, listening, and sharing. Even though it was hard, Larissa did an excellent job in relaying the information in her topic and getting the guys to interact with each other. I know that it was a different for her being the only female in the midst of men. While she was teaching, she put forth a professional persona that gentling demanded respect and this helped her gain the needed admiration amongst the guys to be listened to. I found it interesting seeing how they changed their idea of her. What I mean is that she is a young beauty lady who may not seem like she knows what she is talking about with some recovering drug addicts. But when she started talking, it was easy to see the change in their response to her. It was entertaining for me, because I was planning to work on another talk I was to give this week, but I get all rapped up in what was going on. I believe that it was a good growth experience for Larissa.

That evening – It was a scorching 90+ with humidity during the day and it looked like it was going to be the say during the evening. You should know that the sun does not go down throughout the summer here until after 10 pm, so meeting at 7 pm means that there is still a great deal of heat left in the blazing day sun. When we got to the mom’s group it was starting to rain. This was good and bad. It was good because the humidity finally reached 100% to rain and to cool things off. The bad side was that it could stop some of the moms from coming out. But in all, we had a good number of moms. It seems like a little tropical style down pour will not stop them.
It was great that so many moms showed up that evening, because Sergey was teaching on addictions. It was a good follow up to the codependency talk I gave last week, because it takes them from understanding their own issues to the problems with their families while giving them another chance to exam what has led them to this point in their own lives. I believe that this was what was happening this evening. Through questions and sharing that was done during this time, it was clear that God was taking some of them deeper in breaking the denial and for others starting them down the road to recovery. It is exciting to see how God is using us to bring truth and change to these women. I know that they have a long haul in front of them, but they are trying to move forward. I am encouraged especially when I see someone who is in her 60’s or 70’s making the decision that it is not too late to make changed in her life. I am always amazed at how God works. If we are open, God will show us the way to healing. This is not depended on age, situation, or circumstances, but only on our willingness to allow God into the damaged parts of our lives to work. No matter how far we feel we have gone beyond redemption. God is there to redeem. Seeing elderly people make the move also encourages in my own process of recovery. I understand God’s love for me at a deeper level through what I see him doing in their lives. He does not give in or give up on us. When we am ready, he is wanting. This tells me that my recovery is based on me and my willingness to allow God to work in and on my life. For me this is good news. It makes me want to shout for joy, even though I know that it not as easy I’m putting it.

Wednesday, 18 July 2007 – What a day! This was the first day that our supervisor was going to go with us to one of places to hear and see what we were doing. I know that it is not that big of a deal, but I just had to laugh about it. After minister time yesterday, I tried to finalize the new topic I was going to teach on. I had everything in set. All I needed to do was to sit down and type it out. And you know how Murphy’s Law works, so my computer decided that it was not going to working. I felt good about the topic, but I would have felt better if I was able to type it out, because it would have helped me put things in my own words and in an order that would be easy for me to work with it. I ended up making copies of the pages in the books where I got the information. I highlighted stuff and wrote what I could in the margins. Still I was feeling unprepared for what I needed to do. I gave it up to God and decided to go to bed. I know that it was better for me to be well rested then having everything “prefect.”
With that said let me tell you how things went. I believe that my teaching on recovery was like a continuation of what Sergey taught the evening before. Some of the same people came out to hear what I was teaching on. I know that it was a God thing. I say this for many reason, but one example of why is with happen with one woman. One of the women who is part of the moms’ group opened up for the first time with some of the pain that she has experienced in her life. I believe that my unprepared-ness help me be more in tune with allowing God to use me, because where I wanted to go, but I did not know how I was going to get there. From my past experiences in teaching, I know that I don’t do as well with material that I have not made my own. Having book page copies is not how I like to enter into a teaching session. I know from my experience too that God works through it all. So seeing this woman share reminded me that I’m not the one who is in control. It is all about God and what he is doing in the lives of these people we are interacting with for a point in time in their lives.

That evening – I am co-counseling with Sergey a guy who is working on staff at one of the rehabilitation centers we have been in contact with over the course of these outreaches. All I can say is to pray for me and for this guy. The things he is struggling with are more advanced then anyone I have worked with so far. I’m glad that I am in outreach and have to opportunity to have guidance. I believe that he is fragile and this is what scares me the most. I could really use your prayers on this one. I know you don’t know what is going on. I’m not about to share that, but God knows and he knows what the man needs from him and what is standing in the way of this man receiving it.
Father, use me as a vessel in this man’s life to bring your truth, freedom, and love into his life.

Thursday, 19 July 2007 – Our team has been going to the street kids club, but I have been trying to keep my hours down, so that I will have a better balance of work and family time. This week I went, because I was not sure that I would have enough hours. I’m glad that I went, because I understood that working with this group is not what is on my heart to do. I can do it for the outreach, but I don’t have a desire to continue on doing it as my ministry starts to unfold.
Larissa taught on feeling with the kids. This was like a review of what I had already taught them, but in other ways it went in a different direction to get the some point across. Sometimes it is good to look at the some stuff several time using different angles. She did a great job, but there were a couple of kids who did not really want to be there and took away from the teaching time. This is not what made me decide that street kids club is not for me. I was looking and searched inside myself to notice that I was not into what was going on. I did not have the level of interest that I like to have as I am ministering to others. In short, there was no passion.

Friday, 20 July 2007 – I met with a new client. I met with him once before with Sergey, but it was a one time session deal with no planned follow up. Now he is looking at working on his addiction. God has brought him to a point where he understands that without God’s help in healing him, he will not survive. As he put it, “I have come to the place where I don’t want to hurt anyone any more. And I will die if I lose anyone dear to me, because of my addiction.” He has a tough road ahead of him, but with God it is possible to overcome and receive healing from life’s hurts and pains. God will fill the hole that he feels in his soul. It will take time, care, understanding, and forgiveness, but it is possible.